How to choose a live-in carer: questions to ask when you meet them

What should you look for in a live-in carer?

• Relevant experience, for example caring for someone with dementia, Parkinson's or limited mobility.
• Temperament: patient, calm and kind, especially on difficult days.
• Good communication, with your parent and with the family.
• Practical skills your parent will rely on: cooking, driving, managing a household.
• Fit with the home: happy with pets, a non-smoker if that matters, comfortable in a rural or town setting.

Which checks should be done?

• An Enhanced DBS check (criminal record check)
• References from previous placements, which someone has actually followed up
• Proof of identity and the right to work in the UK
• Training certificates relevant to your parent's needs, such as moving and handling or dementia care
• Insurance, if the carer is self-employed

Every carer we introduce has already been through our checks before you meet them, and we meet each one personally. How we vet carers.

What questions should you ask when you meet?

You'll learn more from how someone answers than from their CV. Some questions families find useful:

• "Tell me about someone you've cared for with similar needs. What did a good day look like?"
• "What would you do if Mum didn't want to get washed or dressed one morning?"
• "How do you like to spend your breaks?"
• "What do you enjoy cooking?"
• "How do you usually keep in touch with the family?"
• "What makes a placement work well for you?"
• "How long do you usually stay with one family?"
• "Are you comfortable with [the dog, stairs, a rural area]?"
• "Is there anything you'd need from us to do this well?"

What should you notice, beyond the answers?

• Do they talk to your parent, or about them to you?
• Does your parent seem relaxed with them?
• Do they ask good questions about your parent's routine and what matters to them?
• Are they honest about what they can and can't do?

Why should your parent lead?

They're the one sharing their home. Even if you're doing the organising, let them ask questions and make the final choice wherever they can. People are far more likely to settle with a carer they chose themselves.

What if two carers share the role?

Live-in carers typically work in rotation, so you'll normally have two carers who take turns. Meet both before deciding, and think about how they'll complement each other.

What if it doesn't work out?

Sometimes it doesn't, and that's nobody's fault. Tell us, and we'll introduce other carers for you to meet.

This guide is general information. Checks and requirements vary between agencies, so ask any agency you use exactly what they check.